The Redneck Date

The Redneck Date

From henceforth H is him and M is me, and being from the rural south I could name off more than one guy like this.  They all talke the same.  I have even had a brother who went through this phase.  If you suspect a guy may be like this, please consider a group date.  At least then you have the potential for semi-intelligent conversation.  It only took once for me to learn that!

H: I have a sweet truck.

M: Really, that's nice. I have a collection of Jane Austen novels.  

H: I'm saving up to get some glass packs.... My truck is going to sound really sweet when I get those puppies installed.  

M: Hmm

H: I put my second of grey primer on my truck this weekend.

M:  Really?  I thought primer was a one time thing.

H:  I just don't have the money to put on the actual paint yet.  

M: But you have the money to have it primed twice?

H:  Pretty sweet, huh?

M:  So, what are your career plans, college plans?

H:  I can't really afford that s*** you know.  Its too hard to get that kind of money together.

M:  But you can buy glass packs and primer!

H: Totally, but those things are real important!  

M: Oh, Totally!

H:  I got a new subwoof the other day.

M:  Heehaw.  *yawn*

This can go on for hours.  Luckily in my case, none of the rednecks actually brought along their Crutchfield magazines or it would have been show and tell time.

I apologize for the choppy dialogue, but I honestly can't present this in paragraph form, because it makes my brain hurt.  I one day hope to be able to undergo hypnosis to eradicate the situation entirely.