Indecent Exposure
Indecent Exposure
My mother-in-law provided me with quite an interesting gift one Christmas year...and it wasn't family friendly...
It was Christmas, year 1995. It was one of the off years when my mother in law was actually still talking to me by Christmas Eve, which meant we were going to her house to celebrate. She always had all sorts of gifts wrapped for my daughter in secret places; kind of like an Easter Egg hunt. Fun for my daughter of course, but not for us who had to sit there for five hours while she searched. Hours later, it was my turn to open my present from her, which I wish she HAD hidden from me, forever. She wrapped it in this beautiful paper, but the present was very oddly shaped. Unfortunately, she had a rule where you were not allowed to rip the paper because she of course folded it to perfection for reuse the following Christmas. I gingerly unwrapped the present from the top and my mind went racing for answers. First, two ceramic heads were revealed. Slowly unraveling the paper, I found two arms in an amorous embrace. The more of the gift that was revealed, the scarier it got. Next, I saw two cold marble slabs of flesh intertwined in what looked to be some sort of Hedonistic act in an NC17 rated film. Meanwhile, my four year old daughter was staring at it agape asking, “what’s that mama?! Let me see Mama!!” I didn’t know whether to jump up and make some sort of spectacle as to shield her innocent eyes from this ceramic abomination or catapult it out of her apartment balcony and pretend nothing happened. Obviously, this was a flea market Christmas special stuck somewhere between a coonskin cap and a floral poncho. Needless to say, I was stuck with this gift that resided in my closet until she visited each time of course, in which case it had to be prominently displayed on my coffee table. Trust me, I had to endure many more years of receiving equally disturbing items, but this one surely rates as one of the worst presents I’ve ever received. Not to mention the many questions my daughter had that I, to this day, refused to answer.
Views: 186
Details
Posted By: modekia7
Published: Nov 29, 2008
Challenge
What's the weirdest gift you've ever given or received?
Summary
My mother-in-law provided me with quite an interesting gift one Christmas year...and it wasn't family friendly...
Tags
gift, scary, inappropriate, trying to explain to a small innocent child, nc17
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